Death

Once in a blue moon, I'll do some pages of work with IZ.

Yesterday, out of the blue, I took out an assessment book and somehow we landed on this page.

Using the tips, we talked about his fear.

He told me he is afraid of dying. He said he's scared he won't be able to play with his toys. He wants to stay.

His exact words: "I want to stay"

I wonder how much a 5 yo knows about death. 

As we think of the future, there are so many uncertainties. 

I told him each and every time we talk about the death topic, that everyone dies, regardless of age. One dies young, one dies old, one dies sleeping, one dies sick.

(I hope we'll be able to build good karma to die comfortably.)

While we are at this topic. I saw someone shared this book and its contents on FB. I took a look and was really thankful. Couldn't be a better timing, really.

At a play date we held in our place 2 days ago, IZ was ultra sensitive and touchy.

He cried over how I compared him with his peers over eating fast / slow. Seems like he has been holding grievances over hubby harping over him eating slowly everyday and suddenly he just exploded.

Then he also cried over me saying he picked fight with everybody. He said "that's not EVERYBODY".

"I want to kill you!!!" in front of everybody. I guess everyone's jaw dropped to the floor.

My heart too.

But I only repeated after him. I reminded myself I had to do the talking after the play date.

So, after guests have left, I told him I felt really sad that he wanted to kill me. Immediately, he cuddled up to me, and hugged me, and kissed me apologizing again and again and that he'd never say that again. I know he didn't mean it, but it was still shocking nonetheless. I wonder from where he got the idea of killing ME. Haiz...

So, when I saw this book "Missing Mommy", I wasted no time in reading to him. He hugged me and said he doesn't want me to die.

But the second round, he wanted to read it himself. He started tearing.

I'm so glad he teared.

He hugged me and kept saying he doesn't want me to die, and that he'll never say he want to kill me again.

Then he stuck to me like glue. Following me everywhere I went, and wanted to sleep beside me and all angelic.

Thanks Cobb!